Dating an emotionless man
Equally, if he shows signs of one then it also might not mean he is emotionally unavailable and that it is just his personality.If he shows signs of a few of the below then it is more than likely that your man is emotionally unavailable.“Men mess up and then we feel badly about it.” One of my best friends in graduate school used to say this.
So our relationship became long distance as he was in another state preparing to go to war. Your needs aren’t getting met and you hate how he treats you.Wanting to find a life partner, spouse, or someone whose shoulder to lean your head upon are a nearly universal desire.Whether it’s the holiday season or Valentine’s Day or the magic of 4th of July fireworks, we know it’s the shared moments that are most special.Amy asks “I fell in love with a wonderful, a younger man (yea for me) and then, he was called to active duty. I may as well have been a wet towel or his mother, the way he treated me. I was told later that this is ‘normal’ for soldiers, and because reintegrating is hard. just knowing I’m there as I was throughout the war. $1,000 of care packages and plane tickets and prayers later, I KNOW I did, and he will tell you that too. Only a woman who believes that a guy won’t appreciate what she is, will focus her efforts elsewhere. The thought of also knowing someone not only military but going to war was beyond my comprehension. it’s tough to wait for someone for 15 months, and to hear of bombs, friends dying etc in his letters. At this point, when he came home last December, he was not a well puppy, though he would like us to think different. He came home – both of us anticipating seeing each other – but then completely let down by experience. but I couldn’t find a balance between what was love and what was him needing someone there.. I know he feels a bond with me as many war vets do with those who helped them stay alive, and that I did, I know I did. But my needs are not getting met and I hate how he treats me now. You are trying to fix, heal, buy, help…so many things with this guy.Emotional availability in a relationship can sometimes seem as elusive as the Holy Grail.
I know how precious this quality is and most definitely a part of the treasure I seek in a solid relationship.
Yet now, if I know I have taken a good look at myself first, I feel more empowered about any observations I have about my date.[Read: What Is Feminism Today?
]Emotional availability cuts both ways, of course, and I can see where I have work to do as well. It would be great to find a man who is at least aware of emotional intelligence and who is willing to work on emotional availability alongside me.
He may even start to resent you because of the pressure you are putting on him.In today's blog post, I am going to go through the signs to determine whether your man is emotionally unavailable, what you should do if he is emotionally unavailable and how to differentiate between him being emotionally unavailable and simply not being interested (hate to say it).If you are reading this blog post then I am guessing you are unfortunately having problems in your relationship and you believe your man may be emotionally unavailable.
Before you label him emotionally unavailable though, lets be sure first.
We all should know this, but of course we knew and planned for this about as much as we did about invading Iraq. Nonetheless, he’s also showing signs of emotional unavailability, and has been for awhile now. He can barely talk to me much anymore about anything deep. Stop buying him things, stop trying to be his solution, and stop behaving like a vet wife or widow because right now, you are throwing everything but the kitchen sink at him and he is not responding. It’s a disproportionate response and you keep making excuses for him to keep being invested and you need to seriously slow your roll.