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At this point, things are probably starting to get comfortable- you make plans regularly, you’re in contact more frequently, and a relationship seems just around the corner.var login Language Array = { "language": { "error_email_required": "Please enter your email address.", "error_email_invalid": "Your email address is invalid.Please choose a valid email address.", "error_wrong_username_password": "Identification impossible.In fact, he’d probably currently look at living together as something that would trap him and confine him. nobody truly ever knows what the future holds for them or their relationship. (By “getting it” I mean the partner not participating in the fantasy that the other one has in his/her mind for the relationship.) Don’t get caught up in fantasy land.Now at this point, it would be really easy for a girl to get really upset and think there’s no future. See things exactly as they are at this exact moment and don’t make it into a problem for yourself. I’m not talking about something that you think is worth coercing him for.Well the truth is that she’d be right to think there’s no future… This is a huge reason why I’m always encouraging the readers here to have fun and fulfillment in their life outside of their relationship – the biggest reason is that when we have idle time to think about our relationship, it can be easy to go into “fantasy” land about the relationship and create conflict and problems in our mind where there is none. If you love him, accept him exactly as he is now and don’t “need” him to be or act differently. I’m talking about something that you NEED and couldn’t live without in the relationship.

because there never really is any future to begin with. the “future” is just an idea or image we have in our head about how things should be or how we want things to be or how we expect things to be. And if you can’t accept him and you absolutely must have him be different than he is now, then let him know what you need and if he can’t give it to you… You know that you NEED something in your relationship if breaking up seems better than continuing a relationship where your need isn’t met.

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He cancels plans, he goes MIA for days at a time, he acts distant.

At the root of it, the same sense of insecurity that made the guy obsessed with finding out if you like him is now scaring him into thinking that you’re going to “take his freedom away.” Generally speaking, most guys have a fear of being “trapped” in a relationship, but in this particular scenario you’re dealing with a guy who’s actions are especially dictated by avoiding unpleasant situations as a primary motivator.

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