Relationship advice for dating single mothers
It’s not a situation to be taken lightly because being in a position to shape a child’s life as a chosen, additional parent is an honor.There will be moments where you’ll have to play counselor and confidant. Sometimes, it can wear on a relationship when a child doesn’t feel free to express themselves.
Majority of the time, it works out well and the parents involved raise children who go on to be productive citizens in the world. My relationship with my father was imperfect and strained.Blended families and the role of stepparents isn’t a particularly new phenomenon in the family structure.We see it in celebrity culture – the Kardashian/Jenner clan and Will Smith’s family for instance.If she prefers not to go out when her kids are home, or doesn’t like to hire a babysitter on school nights, she’ll tell you. If you’re out and she is paying for a sitter it is really nice if you get the check. But if you explicitly ask these details on the first or second date you will appear reluctant about dating a woman with kids.If you don’t ask her out — no matter how innocuous or considerate the reason — she will assume you don’t want to see her. Leave the ask to the last minute, she has to scramble to find a sitter and that’s really uncool. This shows interest in one of the most important things in her life. Sounds cliche’, but I always appreciate it when a guy goes on about how much he adores his niece, or spends time with a friend’s baby. This isn’t necessary, and especially after you have been involved for a while you will likely sort out the who-pays-when conundrum. Which you may be – but if you ask too fast, she will know."Once the boyfriend is introduced there is no going back, and expectations are raised," she adds.
What to do instead: Time is the best measure of knowing when to introduce the children.
I go out with single dads and childless men alike, and some of the latter admit (while others appear) to be uncertain about the logistics of dating single moms.
Don’t assume she’s not free when her kids are home. If you’re interested and want to see her, ask her out. They have a dad, regardless of whether he is in the picture, in the can, or in and out of the psych hospital. Of course you want to know when she is free, if she has the kids all the time and whether the dad is involved.
Here are some tips to help you get the most out of dating a single mom, or even to simply encourage you to give it a shot. You certainly can be a player if that is all you are looking for, but unless you know for sure that the single mom you are wooing wants the same thing, this could seriously backfire on you.
There are single moms out there actively seeking a ring on their finger, and if you play games with the wrong one, you will find yourself in a mess that you’d rather not be in. Don’t be fake Don’t pretend to like her or pretend you are interested, just so that you can have a fling.
From the outside, we may look the same as our single comrades (with no children,) but the insides of our lives, minds and hearts are vastly different.